So, the reason I thought to start a blog at midnight is because I have some thoughts I would like to get out. My dear Grandma died on Wednesday. She was 92 years old, wife of a retired pastor, mother of 4, grandmother of 10, great grandmother of 4, and a great great grandmother. She was a prayer warrior and an encourager, a generous hostess, a follower of Jesus Christ and a worshipper of God. And much much more. A few years ago I came home and sorted through all of the letters and cards I had received. I found that I had more mail from my Grandma and Grandpa Whitney than anyone else by far. When we talked on the phone she would ask me about my friends and cats by name. She cared about the things I cared about. She made me feel like I was her only grandaugheter. We were all her favorite.
I love the hope of heaven that we have in Jesus. I love that she is worshipping God face to face and no longer struggling with pain, sin, sorrow, and all the trials on earth. She went peacefully they said, I think that means she went in joyful anticipation.
Today was the funeral. It was a good time to really process the fact that she is gone. The hardest thing for me was to see my Grandpa cry. They were married for 67 years. The pastor read a poem that Grandpa wrote to Grandma before they were married. He called her his "sweet girl" and said that he could not get along without her. When we all stood to go he was having a hard time walking (partly due to his health, missing a dr. appointment, and low blood sugar) so he sat down in a pew and just cried. I will never forget that. He was also still telling jokes on Monday at the hospital. A couple months ago I saw him standing behind Grandma and stroking her white hair in silly, fun, but loving affection.
The last thing Grandma said to me- in a hoarse voice and short breaths- I love you very very much. She actually said it over and over. Her mind was sharp, she wanted me to remember. She was thinking about other people even as she was dying. Praise God for His spirit in her.
What a comfort to know that our God is all powerful. He is good and His ways are good. So much higher than our ways. Wow! Grandma had SO much love for SO many people- that could only come from God. Praise Him for showing His love through her!
2 comments:
Mara, what a beautiful tribute to the most wonderful woman I have ever known. And you are right we all thought we were her favorites, because we were! Your grandma loved her family so much. Every time I talked to her she told me everything she knew about everyone that was important to her. Sometimes we talked for an hour or more. I really enjoyed being with you yesterday, you were such a big help. Thank you for making a tedious job seem like fun. We really should hang out more often since we do live in the same city.
Love you, Aunt Martha (Marti)
Mara,
What a loving,inspiring and astute tribute you have offered to all of us who were treated to God's love by our lifelong walk with Marguerite Delk Elam Whitney. Many many beautiful smiling memories are dwelling in my heart of stories told of family involving members near and far to "Grandma". It IS true we all felt we were her favorites because She could capture each moment of life with her absolute presence. Her invitation to sit quiet, to wonder to BE a loving giving soulful expression of the ONE who breathed life into each of us. Sit quiet in the spirit of the Almighty. One of her favorite expressions to me as a boy started"Oh Johnny you are a mess"..A smile would creep out of her heart, sneak into her eyes and speaking the kind words needed, She would smile her love on me, rays of sunshine. Stern was gently delivered, softly making a point,patiently and in my case repeatedly until the plaster would take hold and stick to the walls of my mind.
Her departure from this place has left a big hole in many hearts.
At eleven or twelve I once told her,"Mom if I die , I would want you to die too." She laughed and then paused and said," Why Johnny that would be selfish,.. Who would take care of your sisters, your brother and your Father?"
I knew she was right and I knew that I was sad then.
I know She is no longer in pain that she gracefully disguised and dismissed and in the company of loved ones, timeless and boundless, and I take comfort there. I miss her in my heart and hold her close in my soul. My last words to her . You are the BEST MOM i ever had and I love you so much, I'll see you soon, BYE MOM,
love,
unclejohnny
Post a Comment